“Let’s break-up!”
“I’m joking, I’m joking, we will live happily ever after.”
Does this sound familiar? Well, it should, because it’s pretty much every other rom-com out there with these break-ups in the third act. That is getting a little old. Plus, the reason for the break-ups is almost always something completely insane. And mostly, they disregard general human laws, like communication is never happening in these situations. It’s always like something is overheard, then drama and break-up follow, and months later they finally talk and realise it was a huge mistake. Anyway, that’s what this list is about – very bad and disastrous break-ups in romantic comedies.
Oh by the way, SPOILERS.
1. CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET? (2019)
What bothers me the most about this movie, is the fact that the final huge break-up was made into a joke. The guy gets nervous at the interview and accidentally spills all her secrets. The girlfriend freaks out, the coworkers mock her (based on some silly secrets, not even worthy of mocking), she ghosts him, and her flatmate starts to seek revenge. Which then turns into another fight. This movie is a mess. The biggest problem is that there is a great reason for them to break up, which is that he never talks about himself. But instead, this layer of extra nonsense is added and well, I did not care for it. The first act of this movie is pretty okay though.
Also, if you were Mario, you’d probably be too distracted by Daddario to even notice anything else.
2. FIFTY SHADES OF GREY (2015)
Can’t believe I’m mentioning this movie yet again but it just fits perfectly. The drama! The echos of the heartbreak of thousands of women can still be heard in the halls of the cinemas. Tears, emotions, the plea: “don’t hate me” uttered by Christian. (Just to clarify, I had to look this up, I don’t have this movie memorised).
It’s like a slow moving train wreck. You know where it’s heading but still, it’s a solid 20 to 30 minute break-up. The emergency sirens are already ringing, but she just keeps bouncing back. At the end of it you want to scream to Ana: “GET OUT WOMAN!” But she keeps staying, gets punished, still stays and cries in his bed. (Again, had to look this up, I didn’t really remember the details, just the mess). You get like three or four break-up infused scenes, while all you needed was one. Heck, that break-up should have happened when Christian asked Ana to sign that contract.
3. THE WEDDING DATE (2005)
Now, this is the only movie in this list I’m actually sort of in love with. It’s not a perfect rom-com but I find it charming and fun. Also, I seem to remember and seek out a gif of a quote from this movie every now and then. (Props if you can guess which one it is).
Anyway, the biggest problem, and pretty much the only one I have with this movie, is its “break-up”, which is uncalled for. He finds out a secret, it’s not his place to reveal said secret, he gets dumped over the mess somebody else created. From my perspective, and I guess I’m being super rational, I didn’t find the friction to be that big. Which makes it a bad break-up in a sense that it isn’t necessary in this movie in my eyes. By the way, this is 11% on Rotten Tomatoes, while Fifty Shades of Grey is 24%. How is that possible?
THIS SERIES IS CREATED BY WANDERING THROUGH THE SHELVES
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I’ve only seen the last which was a fluffy forgettable little bauble of a film. I’ve have zero interest in any of the Fifty Shades films or books and the first is one I’ve never heard of and based on your cautious description one I don’t think I’ll seek out.
I went with one that seemed too spot on to skip over and two that look at the break-up from the woman’s side of things.
An Unmarried Woman (1978)-Erica Benton (Jill Clayburgh) feels secure in her longtime marriage to husband Martin (Michael Murphy) and their comfortable life with their daughter in New York City. Then one day walking down the street Martin tells her that he’s leaving her for someone else. Blindsided we follow Erica as she grapples with the break-up, reassesses her opinion of herself and finds an identity that isn’t tied to being an extension of someone else’s self-worth. Jill Clayburgh was Oscar nominated for her work.
Under the Tuscan Sun (2003)-After successful literary reviewer Frances Mayes (a luminous Diane Lane) is told her husband is cheating on her by a vengeful author she slides into a deep depression. In an effort to help her out of it her best friend, Patti (Sandra Oh), encourages Frances to take a tour of Italy. During the trip, Frances impulsively buys a rural, somewhat decrepit Tuscan villa and struggles to find her balance again. Surrounded by eccentric characters and the beauty of Tuscany (the cinematography is gorgeous) she discovers a new life and family.
The Break-Up (2006)-Art dealer Brooke (Jennifer Aniston) and tour bus driver Gary (Vince Vaughn) meet cute and despite being opposites soon find themselves deeply involved and sharing an apartment. When their myriad differences finally drive a wedge between them and they break-up neither wants to vacate their home. As each attempts to get the other out their bitterness towards the other grows. Not a great movie but it does have the courage of its convictions and doesn’t cheat the audience with an unrealistic ending.
That dude in Fifty Shades was just horrific, but his awful acting made it into one of the funniest movies I’ve seen 🙂
Are you sure you haven’t got Fifty Shades memorised? ;D
Yes, I rewatched that scene to remember the exact order, I just remember she freaked out after the spanking. 😀
I want to see Can You Keep a Secret? because I’ve read the book. Wait, so they already got together when the interview happen? I sort of vaguely remember that they only really got together at the end of the book, that all the middle parts were just them flirting.
Well then the movie changed some things around, I’d be curious to see what you think since you’ve read the book.