In 2017, I talked about beards. A year later, in 2018, I talked about Sam Rockwell’s beards. This year, in 2019, I turned 30 years old, and this means, it’s time to grow up. And what is more grown up than a mountain of man-butts?…
… a mountain of naked man-butts! That’s right! This year I take it up a notch. I take it all the way up to a very sacred place in my brain-vault where all the butt stuff is stored. But before we can get to the butt stuff, here are some rules to Mt. Rushmore of Movies. A blogathon created by the one and only m.Brown, who’s reviews are funnier than I’m in my dreams. And trust me, I’m pretty damn funny in my dreams if I say so myself! So even though you probably want to get to the butt stuff already, here are the slightly edited blogathon rules. Right below this important butt-moment.
- m.Brown would like to have all posts done by Friday, March 1st
- When you’ve finished, send him a heads up/dick pic (butt pic!?) on twitter @twodollarcinema , reply in the comments on the original post here, e-mail him (email@example.com) or make circles out of black smoke that Amy Adams will decode
- In your post, please use the rad banner his wife designed in eleven minutes. (it’s right there ->)
- Share the announcement, if possible.
- He just wants to tell you ALL good luck! And I want to tell you the same because this is such a great blogathon and you should all participate!
* SEBASTIAN “I’M NOT SURE HOW MUCH OF IT IS HIS BUTT BONUS BUTT” STAN in The Bronze
So, here’s the thing. This could be my favourite man-butt, but this scene is mental. It’s also not completely clear to me how much of it is actually Sebastian Stan’s butt. Like, there’s a bit of it, I’m sure, but there’s probably another butt and there’s also lady butt so.. there’s just a lot of butt. Also, do not open this in front of kids.
4. JAKE “PRETTY BUTT” GYLLENHAAL in Love & Other Drugs
Butt appearance at 00:00
I feel like Jake is everywhere in these lists. He was in my beard list, now his showing off his butt. He is so versatile. Also, on a very very serious note, Love & Other Drugs was actually a great movie! It was a surprising romantic movie, with a comedic aspect but it had a whole lot of butt too… I mean drama, a lot of drama.
3. CHRIS “WHIPPED BUTT” EVANS in Not Another Teen Movie
Butt appearance at 00:31
Was this my first movie butt? Not sure. Was it my first whipped cream movie butt? Yes, and so far, the only one. Chris Evans has surely grown into his acting more and probably doesn’t play around this much. But oh boy, once you see that butt, it’s hard to forget about it… right?!
2. SAM “BAD QUALITY VIDEO BUT A HELL OF A GOOD BUTT” ROCKWELL in Lawn Dogs
Butt appearance at 00:49
Did you think I was not going to mention Sam? You thought wrong because who can forget that man’s butt! Well, I can’t because I really don’t want to. Lawn Dogs is a weird movie, hell of a good one as well and you don’t have to wait long for that butt to make an appearance. Plus, check out Choke too, if you’re already going on the Rockwell train (which you should be on always).
1. CHRIS “CRAZY BUBBLE BUTT” PINES in Stretch
Butt appearance 00:12
Sometimes a butt is a good one even if it’s a little dirty. And Chris Pine doesn’t mind getting a little dirty. Which is good because that’s what makes this mountain a little less perfect and little more mediocre. As is a mountain, not perfect but even with flaws, and a bit of dirt, it’s just as good as any other mountain you climb.
Thank you to m.Brown for hosting this wonderful blogathon, and hopefully I haven’t scarred him away from hosting it next year. Because we all know what comes after butt stuff!2