Life is filled with small moments and subtle joys but then there are those monumental events that society likes to define us by… going to school is the latter. For the past 18 years I have sat and listened to people, who are (in most cases) smarter than me, for the sole purpose of getting a piece of paper. 4 years of grade school, 5 years of primary school, 3 years of high school, 3 years of Bachelor’s, 3 years of Master’s – all together 5 pages of papers stating that I have obtained a certain level of education that indicates my knowledge of certain things. 18 years comes down to 5 pages… and I have no fucking idea what comes next.
I’ve always been the kind of person who simply goes with the flow, never really stopping to think about the future for too long because it looks pretty depressing and I ain’t gonna go down that road. This is why I went to university in the first place, I was afraid to get stuck with a job I have now – you don’t need to point out the irony, I could literally bake it into a cake, that’s how solid it is. Anyway, I studied semiotics and cultural theory for 3 years and though I appreciated the experience, it didn’t really scream “career”. Off I went to study more: wellness and spa service design and management – something new, different and unique. For a moment here and there, it felt like I was about to find the right career path and then, I knew it wasn’t me.
So here I am, two university degrees later, with a job in food service, still single and ready to mingle, scrolling down my Facebook feed and thinking: how the hell did I end up here? Not that the place I’m in is necessarily bad, I have a roof over my head and a steady income to invest in popcorn and soda when I go to the cinema, but I can’t help to wonder whether I have made the right choices.
Somewhere in between having your choices selected for you and you actually making choices for your offspring, your own choices suddenly became your own sole responsibility. At first, there are small choices, having a favorite a toy, an item of clothing, the right kind of ice cream just for you. Then, more important choices of type of friends, type of music, type of movies you love that will all slowly shape you into you. Then, boom, and every possible choice you could ever imagined is right in front of you and you have to choose and stick with it because god forbid, if you love Justin Bieber and then choose not to – that’s just wrong, right?
No worries, it’s not that dramatic but you get the idea, choices are important and sometimes it’s hard to make them because some of those choices are permanent. For me, choosing the type of educational path was a permanent choice, I can’t go back, I can’t start over because I already used up my free-education from the government. Which is ironic because 6 years ago I wanted to go to film school but I couldn’t because it cost money I didn’t have and now, the government made it free!
When I found that out I laughed because it seemed such a typical thing, I had made my choices due to certain circumstances and now, those circumstances have changed and I can’t go back. Well, things happen I guess and I can only hope the educational choices I’ve made will help me succeed one way or the other… I just have to push forward and keep going. Which is a bit hard since I have no idea what I’m going to do but hey, I guess it was about time I started living my life like as an adventure!
I wrote this post because I felt like I was stuck, which is a feeling I still have but I’m trying to cope with it and writing is my coping mechanism. So, I apologize for this post not having anything to do with movies or TV-shows but as you might have noticed from the title, it’s a brand new feature!! No, just kidding, it’s simply naming the essay-type posts I sometimes publish under a common name.
Hope you enjoyed this one and have a great week, guys!0
Great post! 😀
The only thing that would make this post idea even better is if I could actually sit down and have a coffee with you.
As for your worries, I don’t have a lot of solid advice because I still haven’t figured it out yet but I will say that I think whatever comes up for you, you will do just fine. You have so much passion that it will certainly translate into whatever it is you do. I hope I get to follow you on your adventures through your writing. 🙂
I’m with Lindsay, sitting down and having a cup of coffee with you is the only thing that would make this post even better. I can relate to that. I switched majors in college too, which I still totally kick myself for because that was a waste of money. (When I saw “free education from the government” I wanted to cry. lol) I hope you find something fulfilling and fun and that still allows the time to go to the cinema. 🙂
hold up, no school=no me.. so i think you made a right choice in there somewhere 🙂
Hey, man, when I get back to our lovely country, let’s go catch a movie and I can tell you how inspiring you’ve been, and how all your work in school has helped, in some way or other, shape you into the inspiring person you are.
Also, have you thought of a — long overdue — gap year? 🙂
Hang in there Ray! I do felt the same with you though, i am weighing my option whether i should search for a scholarship to continue my studies or maybe settle and work before that. I love studying and learning new things, but i just can not deal with writing the final thesis! GAH!